[ closed post: hold fast to the center ]

[lightbearinglord]

With Dark behind them, most of Lan Wangji's routine has managed to reassert itself. He awakens at mao hour and disentangles himself from his clinging cultivation partner, who tends to sprout several additional limbs in the night. He dresses and slips away for his morning meditation. He takes Bichen to the air, circles the grounds of the mansion and checks the woods for any changes beyond the known quantities of Ragnelle's nest and Magnus' camp, and runs through his sword forms. He stops in the kitchen and makes breakfast for his husband. By that point, his day can branch in several ways: he can, upon bringing the breakfast to Wei Ying, also opt to return to his bed, a perpetually tempting option. He can find Magnus and indulge in listening to him talking about whatever strikes his fancy. He can practice his qin, work on his calligraphy, retreat to the library for the endless project of educating himself, or embark on some more ambitious culinary endeavor.

Recently, however, Lan Wangji was reminded of a promise he made to someone important. Where possible, he prefers to keep his promises. So this morning, after he has sufficiently fed Wei Ying, made his apologies in the form of several lingering love-bites along his neck and shoulders, and changed his boots for house slippers, he approaches Claudius and Galahad's room. This route is one of the few persistently familiar paths that seem to exist in the ever-changing mansion.

It is early, but not so early. And Claudius did ask him for this, not once but twice. He lifts a hand and knocks crisply at the door.

Comments

[wickedwit]

Ah, of course. Claudius could almost roll his eyes, if it weren't for the tragedy of it. He's met bastard sons of nobility who would do anything for their fathers' approval, to have some proof their birth and life were worth something, despite their illegitimacy¹. "I see. Despite Meng Yao's last minute reversal and acceptance as a Jin, I take it Nie Mingjue wouldn't forgive the slaughter of his subordinates that easily."

¹ Edmund. He's thinking about Edmund FromKingLear.

[lightbearinglord]

"No. Nie Mingjue was a morally rigid man." Famously so, and he was one of the first to condemn Wei Ying and advocate for his exile from the cultivation world. Lan Wangji is glad for the small, peaceful world of this room, the lingering and familiar sandalwood scent, and Claudius' company. It makes it easier not to dwell. He is not telling that story today.

"After the war, my brother, Nie Mingjue, and Jin Guangyao entered a sworn brotherhood, the Venerated Triad. Nie Mingjue was reluctant, but agreed. Xiongzhang knew he wanted to monitor Jin Guangyao."

[wickedwit]

"Thy brother was popular, to have two sworn brothers. No wonder he was counted among the cultivation world's eligible bachelors." A tease, but a softly-made one. From the way Lan Wangji has described him, Claudius imagines Lan Xichen as a kind, attentive man who cares as deeply as Lan Wangji himself does, and who would've taken his oaths of brotherhood seriously. A loyal man, whose heart would be divided between two of his sworn brothers' enmity for each other -- and Lan Xichen lost them both. It's sincere, when Claudius says, "It's a shame his heart was not treated more kindly."

[lightbearinglord]

The cultivation world's most eligible bachelor, Lan Wangji could correct him -- but he knows Claudius must remember that. Lan Xichen has always wanted to please and see the best in everyone. One brother, killed by the other. Lan Wangji thinks it will be some time yet before Lan Xichen emerges from seclusion and resumes his duties.

"Yes," he says, simple enough and equally sincere. There is a story to resume. "Xiongzhang, Wei Ying, and I determined that we would investigate further at a Lanling Jin discussion conference the following month. Jin Guangyao had been the sect leader for years by then, following Jin Guangshan's death."

[wickedwit]

An investigation at a discussion conference. Claudius's interest is certainly piqued. "A fine opportunity, with so many gathered. How didst thou proceed?" he asks.

[lightbearinglord]

"Wei Ying used the Paper Metamorphosis technique the evening of the pre-conference banquet." A little abruptly, Lan Wangji's face softens with fondness. "It is dangerous, but it affixed his soul to a small piece of paper in the shape of a man. He slipped into Jin Guangyao's quarters to spy on him, and discovered his hidden treasure room in the process."

[wickedwit]

A hidden room! And a little paper man with Wei Wuxian's soul -- Claudius's eyes catch on that moment of softening fondness, as they always do on his friend's face. "Dangerous, and fiendishly clever. Wei Wuxian seems to like plans that are both."

[lightbearinglord]

Lan Wangji gives himself that moment to recall Wei Ying's paperman, the absurd fragility of it in his hands with Wei Ying's unconscious form beside him. Wei Ying's soul, which had already spent thirteen years in fitful, half-aware discontentment, in the flimsiest possible vessel. They needed those answers, but his breath had not quite filled his lungs properly until Wei Ying returned to his new body. "He barely escaped. I called him back just in time. Before Jin Guangyao discovered him, however, he found a land deed for Yunping, and the final piece of Nie Mingjue's body."

[wickedwit]

“The head,” Claudius says, not because it needs to be said, but because it feels like a call-and-response. The last piece of a puzzle, locking into place. “He’d kept it?”

[lightbearinglord]

"The head. He had kept it, heavily suppressed." With that, Lan Wangji turns grimmer again. "Its resentful energy was so strong that it pulled Wei Ying into the Empathy technique without his permission. He saw Nie Mingjue's memories and much of his history with Jin Guangyao."

[wickedwit]

"Extraordinary. Did he tell thee what he saw?" It's almost impossible to imagine he didn't. The more Claudius hears stories from Lan Wangji's past, the more he understands Wei Wuxian's courtship was a faltering, awkward thing -- all the more reason for Lan Wangji to advise Crowley against secrets and subtlety¹. But they trust each other so completely now, and these journeys must have gone a long way to building up that trust.

¹ Claudius. Claudius. Who told Crowley to be subtle? I'm your typist, and I won't let you get away with that.

[lightbearinglord]

"Yes, later." Lan Wangji takes another short pause. He has always known this story would continue to intersect unavoidably with some painful memories. He would not have volunteered to tell it if he did not already trust Claudius with these things. "In the escape from Carp Tower, Wei Ying's identity was revealed and he was injured. We took him back to the Cloud Recesses so that he could recover. Our next move was uncertain, because I trusted Wei Ying, and my brother trusted Jin Guangyao."

[wickedwit]

Claudius knows how Lan Wangji loves, how fiercely and how endlessly -- I have never known how to feel anything by halves, he'd said, or how to love with any reservation. Lan Wangji was once a young man who touched no one, and now whenever he returns a touch, he grasps back with both hands. I have also never known how to take back my love once it is given away. He said that, too. It struck Claudius to his soul, the realization that after countless cycles of fairweather friends and temporary allies, he found a friend whose love would never leave him.

Lan Wangji loved Wei Wuxian, and trusted him. He loved and trusted his brother, but his brother was wrong. Loving both, he had to act, and the next move was uncertain. That uncertainty must have been agony.

"Ah," he says, and lets it say all of that. He touches Lan Wangji's hand.

[lightbearinglord]

The touch surprises him, a pleasant and welcome surprise like the first warm breeze of an oncoming summer. In this room, Claudius dressed in the style of his world and reaching kindly for him, he feels the reassuring weight of their agreed-upon brotherhood more than ever. Now that he is no longer a young man who touches no one but a grown man who touches the people he loves with gratitude for it, he turns over both of his hands, palms up, and offers them to Claudius.

"Wei Ying awoke four days later," he continues, and his voice remains calm. "He understood why my brother could not trust the Yiling Patriarch. He had seen Nie Mingjue's memories, and knew that during the years leading up to his death, he had been struggling more and more to soothe his qi as a result of his saber cultivation. Jin Guangyao would play the qin for him. Xiongzhang had taught him a musical cultivation technique, Cleansing. This technique calms the mind and spirit. On his bamboo flute, Wei Ying played the melody he had heard within Empathy. It was not Cleansing."

[wickedwit]

Claudius clasps Lan Wangji's hands, with both of his own, giving as much as he's given. He runs his fingers, over the back of Lan Wangji's, steady and soothing. "What was it?" he asks.

[lightbearinglord]

"Below the Cloud Recesses library pavilion, the Room of Forbidden Books houses more dangerous texts. After the Cloud Recesses was burned during the war, Jin Guangyao helped fund the rebuilding effort." He looks fondly down at their joined hands for a moment, and then back to Claudius' face. "We discovered a page missing from the Collection of Spirit Turmoil, a book of songs from Dongying with the ability to stir up agitation and illness in the listener."

[wickedwit]

Claudius presses Lan Wangji's hands for his own comfort, here. Naturally he doesn't care for the idea of some song that could ruin his health, turning his own body against him like the blood parasites did. With all his anxious, constant medicating and brewing of medications, it may be one of his worst fears. "He would've been covering his tracks, then," Claudius pieces together. "So no one would be able to read it there, and identify the same notes in his song. And that's what would lead to a death that appears to be by qi deviation."

[lightbearinglord]

"Yes." Lan Wangji returns the firmness of Claudius' grip, matching it. That page should never have left the Room of Forbidden Books, which is locked and open to only a few. Its contents are there as much to protect the world from them as to protect them from the world. But, as he has already said, his brother trusted Jin Guangyao. "I don't know how Nie Huaisang discovered it, but he knew. Jin Guangyao had dismantled the body because Nie Mingjue's resentment was so powerful. Nie Huaisang was still a poor cultivator and could find only the arm. That is why he wanted Wei Ying alive again."

[wickedwit]

Claudius nods slowly. "So that old, forbidden ritual of Mo Xuanyu's ..."

[lightbearinglord]

Lan Wangji nods, too, more crisply. "Nie Huaisang convinced Mo Xuanyu to perform the sacrificing ritual, then planted the disembodied arm at Mo Village. He knew Wei Ying. We were all students together. He knew that Wei Ying would solve it."

[wickedwit]

"Wei Wuxian is the first one I would go to for such a puzzle, too." It's not a puzzle that comes up often in his own life, admittedly. Claudius feels a mixed yet strong respect for Nie Huaisang (like certain drinks). Certainly, he'd preyed upon Mo Xuanyu in a moment of weakness ... but also gave him the means to take revenge¹. While bringing back a lost friend and ally on which Nie Huaisang could rely, sharply aware of what was possible on his own, and what was beyond his abilities. A useful skill for for a head-shaker to have.

¹ It's just something Claudius might considering doing if he had a vengeful young man in front of him and a problem to solve, that's all. Perhaps not the whole self-sacrificial ritual. (It's incidental that the duel at the end of Hamlet turned into a sort of self-sacrificial ritual for revenge.)

[lightbearinglord]

For that, Lan Wangji's steady gaze goes a little warmer, just briefly. It still strikes him with quiet gladness when people here seem to pick up his admiration for Wei Ying's good qualities. He always imagined his feelings for Wei Ying as too big to contain, too bright to dim, emanating from him and turning him into a beacon. Here, for the first time, it feels as if others can see that, and they let that light reflect onto them. "Mn," he says, and then he sobers again. "Nie Huaisang was determined to see Jin Guangyao's downfall. Wei Ying's resurrection was only one piece of his plan."

[wickedwit]

"Of course." What's a scheme without many moving pieces? "What we were the others?"

[lightbearinglord]

Where to begin? Lan Wangji doesn't let go of Claudius' hands, but he does relax his grip again. "Without revealing his identity, he sent Jin Guangyao a letter, threatening him with the public reveal of his crimes within seven days. A second siege of the Burial Mounds commenced, as Jin Guangyao panicked and tried to identify his accuser." He realizes, as he says it, that he has never explained precisely the circumstances of Wei Ying's death to Claudius. He hesitates, then says, "I will tell you of the first another day." It has been too peaceful and companionable a morning for that now.

[wickedwit]

"I know thou wilt," Claudius says, and the words come so easily it surprises him. Usually he's too prying and curious to let something like that go -- but he felt no doubt at all that Lan Wangji would tell him later. Lan Wangji remembers the promises he makes.